I was wrong
by oldmule
Summary: A happier time - Havensworth.  A regretful  Ruth watches Harry in the hotel bar and resolves to set things right.
1. Chapter 1

**Oh for the happy, heady days of Havensworth when life was full of hope, possibilities and sexual tension.**

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><p>She put the phone down and sighed.<p>

He was sat at the hotel bar, another shirt and tie having a drink at the end of the day.

She wished she had more courage.

The courage to ring him right now.

The courage to have not fled the night before ... in the corridor.

But the look on his face. The desire in his eyes.

She shook her head and tried to rub the heat from her face, the heat that inevitably rose up whenever she thought about that moment.

And as she watched him sitting there, she felt sorry, sorry for all her mixed signals, sorry for his confusion, sorry for the lonliness that he personified just sitting there.

It was that sorrow and regret that made her get up and leave the room.

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><p>"Hi," she said softly.<p>

"Hi," he said, masking the surprise that she was even there.

He waited, expecting some message, something about the conference, some intel.

"May I?'

She nodded to the stool beside him.

"Er...yes," he stuttered, surprised once more, "can I get you something…?

She smiled slightly, glancing at the barman who had slid into place.

"Large G and T, please."

Harry was confused.

She had rejected him after their dinner date, avoided him where possible on the grid and positively ran from him in the corridor but most of all, as far as he knew, she didn't drink G and T.

And now here she was, he glanced at his watch, at 11.30pm, asking to join him for a drink. If this was personal, not professional it didn't bode well.

The glass was placed before her.

She took a sip that became two and then three.

"Thirsty?"

"Parched," the glass rose to her lips once again and then it was empty, "And to be honest I needed it in order to say what I'm about to say."

"Same again," asked the attentive barman.

"Please, only larger," she handed him the glass.

Harry was looking at her, waiting. Waiting for the final 'I can't do this' she had obviously come to deliver.

But she said nothing.

When the drink arrived she eagerly began to consume it once more.

He thought about trying to argue his case but then he hung his head and prepared for the sentence.

"Harry…"

He had taken comfort in the bottom of his own glass, swirling the contents around hypnotically.

"Harry."

"It's okay, Ruth. You've made yourself clear enough before now. I'm not exactly a teenager who needs letting down gently."

"Can you remember that far back?'

He glanced at her and saw the playful smile lurking at the corner of her mouth.

"Only when the mists of time clear sufficiently, Ruth."

She took another drink. The glass was empty again.

She waved the barman away as he approached. It was enough to say what she needed to say.

"Harry…"

"Yes."

"I'm sorry."

He nodded sadly, "you don't need to …"

Her hand slid across the bar and found his.

"I was wrong."

"Wrong? About what?"

She hesitated. Maybe she did need another drink. No, she just needed him to understand what she was trying to say.

But he just looked at her.

And he wasn't the only one, she could see through the mirror behind the bar. There were a couple of the Foreign Secretary's security detail looking on, clearly aware of the intense, if confused, conversation that was going on at the bar.

She moved her hand away. This was a mistake.

"Ruth?"

"I'm sorry," she said again, but this time she was on her way out.

"Ruth…"

The security detail looked at him. He glared and turned back to the bar.

"Double," he snapped at the barman.

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><p>Ruth sat on her bed.<p>

Why was she doing this here? Wrong place, wrong time.

But wasn't it always.

She ran her hand through her hair. She wasn't being fair to him, she knew that but she was caught. Caught between dream and reality.

A knock on her door failed to distract her.

Harry turned away shaking his head wondering what the hell he was doing.

No, this needed to be sorted out, otherwise who knew how long it could go on for.

The second knock roused her.

She opened the door blankly.

They stood, each staring at the other, neither speaking.

Down the corridor the lift binged and laughter rang out as the doors slid open and several people began to emerge.

Harry stepped quickly into the room, closing the door behind him.

Like a startled deer Ruth's eyes were wide with surprise.

"I don't think this is a conversation to be had across the threshold, do you?" he said. more statement than question.

"No," she answered quietly.

She turned away, it was all too much. The gin had most definitely gone to her head and now here was Harry standing in her room, demanding to have a conversation, wanting answers.

And she couldn't blame him.

He waited but there was only silence.

"Harry … I …." her sentence tailing off into the ether.

"What? What is it you're trying to say, Ruth."

"I'm sorry … but you need to go," she moved past him to the door, ignoring the confusion and frustration on his face.

As she reached for the handle and opened the door, his palm banged down hard against it and it snapped shut.

She looked up at him.

"Ruth…." He whispered huskily, "what do you want from me?"

"To leave."

But he didn't leave, he only leant closer, his mouth almost touching her ear.

"Not until you tell me what you were wrong about."

She couldn't say it, he was too near, she was too hot.

He moved slowly so that he was looking at her, his eyes insistent, his expression set and determined. Yet still he was so very close.

"Ruth, it's nearly midnight but I swear I'm going nowhere until you talk to me."

She realised there and then that there was no way she could talk to him about this and so she resolved to do the next best thing.

She kissed him.


	2. Chapter 2

**Short one. Got to go to work. Thanks for reviews.**

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><p>It was a curious thing, kissing Harry.<p>

In fact, the thought came to her almost immediately.

Though on second thoughts 'curious' was not the right word, though the 'curious' thing and the thing that filled her mind completely was how well her lips fitted his. How well they slipped into place, curved and drifted together, how they seemed almost to know each other.

It was a brief thought.

It was a brief kiss.

The door at her back suddenly vibrated violently.

"Ruth?"

The knock came again.

"Ruth?" came Ros's voice.

She and Harry sprung apart. Now they stood looking at each other.

"Just a second," called Ruth.

"We haven't got a second. I need you in the briefing room now."

"Okay. I'm coming."

Ruth almost wished that Ros would stay as she realised she had no clue what she was about to say to Harry.

"Oh, and Harry," called Ros through the closed door, "we need you too."

The surprise flicked across Harry's face. The mortification settled on Ruth's.

"We better go," she said quickly.

"Ruth?" he stepped closer.

But the door opened in his face and she was gone.


	3. Chapter 3

**Sorry another short one as I've just got in from work!**

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><p>They stood and although their eyes were fixed on Ros as she briefed them, it was their peripheral vision which served to <em>trans<em>fix them.

Each painfully…mentally…physically… aware of the presence of the other.

And for all that they were listening, the only thing which really took their attention was the echo of a new, very recent memory.

A memory of a kiss.

When Ros had finished she moved away but not before Ruth reached her.

"It wasn't what you think," whispered Ruth.

"What wasn't?"

She wondered if Ros was being deliberately obtuse.

"Harry…" she didn't know what else to say.

Ros nodded thoughtfully.

"Ruth, quite frankly I didn't think anything and if I did, it's got nothing to do with me what you and Harry get up to."

"We weren't up to anything."

"Whatever you say," said Ros turning away, smirking.

Harry sidled towards Ruth as the team moved purposefully into action.

One glance from beneath her lashes was all he got.

"You need to have a word with Ros," she breathed, "she thinks that there's something going on between us."

He looked at her.

"There is, Ruth."

And he strode away.


	4. Chapter 4

It seemed to Ruth that it had gone on all day. Hushed conversations, sly smiles, sideways glances.

In the hallway, the corridors, the reception. Wherever she went she felt that not only her colleagues in Five but also the security details were all watching, all speculating, all laughing.

It was as though her greatest fear had come true.

They were all talking about her.

About her and Harry. Her and her boss. In a hotel room, at a conference. How predictable, how seedy, how embarrassing.

A peal of laughter came from Ros and Adam at the back of their ops room.

And it was enough.

"I'd just like to say that, no matter what you think, there was nothing going on with Harry and me, in my room last night."

The team looked up startled by her forthright proclamation.

She looked at Harry for confirmation.

"Ruth's right," said Harry, "though it wouldn't have been for want of trying."

Adam laughed. Ruth's head snapped from him to Harry, her face full of accusation.

"Well, not on my part anyway," he added.

She shook her head and began to gather up her files ready to beat a hasty retreat from further humiliation.

"Ruth, it 's not any of our business," offered Adam softly.

"That's what you all keep saying to my face, behind my back it's nothing more than salacious gossip"

"No one's talking about us, Ruth," said Harry patiently.

"It doesn't seem like that to me.".

He was starting to lose his temper.

"Yes, well, it's only a shame Ros knocked when she did otherwise we might have given them something bloody interesting to gossip about."

"Harry!"

"What, Ruth, you were the one who kissed me?"

At that very moment Zaf entered the room, eyes wide looking at Ruth. He was about to say something when Adam caught his attention, shaking his head in warning.

"Yes, well only because I didn't know what to say."

"I don't know what to say right now," said Zaf looking around, "anyone want to kiss me?"

"No," snapped Ruth.

Ros laughed.

"This is no laughing matter," Ruth raged.

"No, it's not," growled Harry… but not at Ros.

He glanced up and with a flick of the head effectively dismissed them all, bar Ruth.

They silently trooped out.

Harry let the door shut.

"Ruth," he said quietly, "this is getting ridiculous."

She failed to answer.

"You have been over reacting all day. I still don't know what you thought you were wrong about yesterday but I can tell you that you are wrong now, to react like this."

"I wasn't wrong. I was right." She announced.

He was getting confused.

"I thought I was wrong to have reacted as I did, I thought we should see each other if we wanted."

Harry felt a huge weight lifted from him and stepped towards her.

"But it would never work because people would always be talking about us and diminishing your authority. I was right. This has proved it."

She sat back on the desk folding her arms.

"But the damage has already been done, Ruth."

He waited.

"I know," she said sorrowfully.

"And however much you protest right now you will only make it worse, they'll only be made more certain that there was something going on."

She sighed,

"I know."

"So…would it not be easier, Ruth, to just give up and go with the flow?"

She looked at him.

"Go with the flow?" she repeated, it didn't seem a very Harry expression.

"Yes, go with the flow…play along."

He stepped slowly closer, his eyes flickering with mischief.

"I mean if they already think you're doing what you're not doing, then why not start doing what they think you're doing... and enjoy it?"

"Enjoy it?"

"Yes…"he whispered leaning rather close, "enjoy it."

Ruth's head lifted up to him, her lips a breath away from his.

"But…"

"But what?"

"What will they say?" she asked.

"Nothing…" he smiled, kissing the corner of her mouth softly, "…they've already said it."

It was curious how well their lips fitted. Curious, she thought… and rather wonderful.

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><p>Pos epilogue to come.<p> 


	5. Epilogue

**Thanks for all the lovely reviews. Here's the epilogue.**

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><p>"Hi, is…er…Harry there?" Zaf tentatively asked.<p>

A small pause.

"Yes."

Then the muffled sound of the phone being handed over.

"Zaf," rasped a gruff sounding Harry.

"Harry, we seem to be having a problem with your mobile."

"It's off."

"That'll be it then."

"Though you still managed to find me."

"Wild guess," ventured Zaf, the smile evident in his voice.

There was a long pause and he wondered if Harry was still there, or if he had said too much.

"Well?" demanded Harry.

"The delegations are almost ready to leave. The Foreign Secretary wants to speak to you before he does his interview with Breakfast News."

"How long have I got?"

"Forty minutes."

"Right."

"Another five at a push."

"Right."

"...Plenty long enough," dared Zaf and hastily hung up.

Ruth reached round to replace the receiver.

"What is it?" she asked.

A hand slid across her stomach towards her hip and pulled her forcefully back.

A rather dishevelled but contented Harry lay beside her but yet he did not answer.

He lay looking at her, their faces only inches apart on the pillow. His eyes full of desire, his mouth unable to resist the grin that pulled at it.

Ruth's hand was gliding up and down his back with a featherlite touch that made him shiver.

"You have to go?"

"Yes."

Her hand paused.

"…But not quite yet," he said, pulling her hips even closer still.

"If you're late they'll know what we've been doing."

"I think they've already gathered that, Ruth," he smiled, "though I don't plan to be late."

Her hand resumed its movement, but this time sank lower.

"In that case, Harry, you'd better stop talking and get on with whatever you've got in mind."

His eyes sparkled with devilment as his lips sought out the nape of her neck.

"What _have_ you …got in mind?" she asked, almost losing track of the sentence part way through, distracted as she was.

His lips rose to her ear.

A smile began to spread slowly across her face as she listened to his whispered words of intent.

"Will that do, Ruth?"

"Very nicely..." she breathed between kisses, "...for now."

And with that they began to make very good use of every one of the remaining thirty nine minutes that were left to them.


End file.
